Jason Shiga (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} shiga) wrote,@ 2003-01-31 12:36:00 |
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The Burglary!
Our house was burglarized this Monday. Hedda, my roommate, was pretty traumatized. The burglar stole our CD player and a bunch of Hedda's CDs. This is ironic because he really only stole empty CD cases. And our CD player was broken anyways; we were just using it as a radio. A suitcase and a pound of loose change was stolen as well. But the burglar left behind his 12 speed bicycle, a wrench and his shirt in our driveway. Score! I explained to Hedda that even though he probably crawled in through her bedroom window, from a purely materialist point of view we came out ahead in the transaction. She was not comforted by this.
The bicycle had a flat tire and I've been going nuts trying to construct a narrative to explain how he got it here in the first place. It's like one of those lateral thinking problems except the only one who knows the solution is kicking our CD player right now. The best I could come up with is that some Raider's fan needed to come up with $500 fast. So he went on a burglarizing spree starting with my neighbor's 12 speed. He then moved on to our house stealing items he knew he could easily resell like CD's and boom boxes and loose change. He packed his booty in Hedda's suitcase and was about to make his getaway but realized the tire had a flat so he took off on foot. But this doesn't really explain why he stole the bike in the first place.
My Mom thinks it was Rick, the world's worst plumber. And now that she mentions it, I do remember him covetously eyeing my possessions as he walked through the house.
Our house was burglarized this Monday. Hedda, my roommate, was pretty traumatized. The burglar stole our CD player and a bunch of Hedda's CDs. This is ironic because he really only stole empty CD cases. And our CD player was broken anyways; we were just using it as a radio. A suitcase and a pound of loose change was stolen as well. But the burglar left behind his 12 speed bicycle, a wrench and his shirt in our driveway. Score! I explained to Hedda that even though he probably crawled in through her bedroom window, from a purely materialist point of view we came out ahead in the transaction. She was not comforted by this.
The bicycle had a flat tire and I've been going nuts trying to construct a narrative to explain how he got it here in the first place. It's like one of those lateral thinking problems except the only one who knows the solution is kicking our CD player right now. The best I could come up with is that some Raider's fan needed to come up with $500 fast. So he went on a burglarizing spree starting with my neighbor's 12 speed. He then moved on to our house stealing items he knew he could easily resell like CD's and boom boxes and loose change. He packed his booty in Hedda's suitcase and was about to make his getaway but realized the tire had a flat so he took off on foot. But this doesn't really explain why he stole the bike in the first place.
My Mom thinks it was Rick, the world's worst plumber. And now that she mentions it, I do remember him covetously eyeing my possessions as he walked through the house.
