Jason Shiga (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} shiga) wrote,@ 2003-02-08 12:36:00 |
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Another Attempt to Get Lisa to Like Me
After several days of working through reams of propositional calculus, constructing strategy trees and game theory matrices, I had a theoretical solution. It was a complex operation with several stages to it but also had several events running in parallel as fail safes. It involved a third party, a ring of cel phones, a bottle of J-Lo perfume, synchronized watches and a 976 wake-up service set to call up Hedda at precisely 8:23pm. I had to block out entire days for the prep work alone.
After rehearsing the script with Hedda, rechecking all of my calculations, the first stage of the operation was set to go. I walked into the Copy Central and said to Lisa, "Hedda and I are going to see 'Maid in Manhattan' tonight. How'd you like to join us?"( Note: the events depticted in this blog actually took place several weeks ago during the three week window that "Maid in Manhattan" was in the theaters).
(Another note: Ah yes, my solution was brilliant in its passive aggressive deviousness! I was asking Lisa out on a date without actually going through the humiliation of asking her out on a date. How is it a date if Hedda's tagging along you ask? Well on the way to the theater, Hedda's cel phone would ring and she'd tell us that her brother just died and to go on without her.)
Lisa looked disappointed. "I wish I could go with you guys but I already made plans to be at my friend's housewarming party tonight."
For some reason, this contingency hadn't even occurred to me. I just assumed she'd be watching reruns of The Practice on the WB (like I do every Saturday night).
"I'll be by the library on Thursday, though." Lisa said. "You can tell me all about the movie then."
After several days of working through reams of propositional calculus, constructing strategy trees and game theory matrices, I had a theoretical solution. It was a complex operation with several stages to it but also had several events running in parallel as fail safes. It involved a third party, a ring of cel phones, a bottle of J-Lo perfume, synchronized watches and a 976 wake-up service set to call up Hedda at precisely 8:23pm. I had to block out entire days for the prep work alone.
After rehearsing the script with Hedda, rechecking all of my calculations, the first stage of the operation was set to go. I walked into the Copy Central and said to Lisa, "Hedda and I are going to see 'Maid in Manhattan' tonight. How'd you like to join us?"( Note: the events depticted in this blog actually took place several weeks ago during the three week window that "Maid in Manhattan" was in the theaters).
(Another note: Ah yes, my solution was brilliant in its passive aggressive deviousness! I was asking Lisa out on a date without actually going through the humiliation of asking her out on a date. How is it a date if Hedda's tagging along you ask? Well on the way to the theater, Hedda's cel phone would ring and she'd tell us that her brother just died and to go on without her.)
Lisa looked disappointed. "I wish I could go with you guys but I already made plans to be at my friend's housewarming party tonight."
For some reason, this contingency hadn't even occurred to me. I just assumed she'd be watching reruns of The Practice on the WB (like I do every Saturday night).
"I'll be by the library on Thursday, though." Lisa said. "You can tell me all about the movie then."
