My New Bike
I am now the proud owner and rider of a green 12 speed bicycle. I've been riding up hills and up onto curbs. When I go down a steep hill now I can just squeeze the handlebars to slow down to a comfortable speed. This bike was left for me (along with a wrench and a shirt) in my garage last month. I realize it was probably stolen, but I did everything I could to try and locate its original owner. Also finders keepers.

I actually went from door to door to ask all of my neighbors if they'd had a bike stolen. Then I went so far as to call up the police. I figured there was an off chance that the owner registered his serial number. After navigating through their automated recording maze, I found a real person and asked her if she could look up a particular serial number to see if it's been registered.

"We can't do that." She said. "But we can send an officer to pick up the stolen bike."

"But what happens if they can't locate the original owner? Do I get the bike back? Or do they just sell it off in a police probate auction?"

"You can ask the officer when he gets there." She said. "What's your address?"

"Uh, I was just speaking hypothetically." I said and hung up.